Whether you’re single, coupled up or not sure exactly what the heck your relationship status is, we can all use a little more love in our lives. Love from others? Yes. Love from ourselves? Absolutely!
Having an open, love-filled heart makes life happier, eases anxiety and may even prevent colds (no, seriously!). Not to mention, being in love, receiving love and giving love lights us up and makes us fulfilled. Plus, who doesn’t love those warm and fuzzy feels? 🙂
No matter your relationship status, here’s how you can boost the love in your life this new year:
Choose A. If you’re single, B. If you’re in a relationship and C. If you’re finding yourself in a “situation” and not sure where the heck you stand. Or read them all!
A. If you’re single …
Clear your pretty head and open your heart. No matter what happened in your past, it’s a new year and there’s love to be had. Dating may be the last thing you want to think about, but try making a point to set up a few meet-ups between now and the end of the month.
Of course there are dating apps (perhaps not your ideal way to meet your future beau, but you are putting yourself out there and have a better chance connecting than spending the weekend binge-watching The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel). You can also ask mutual friends to set you up, visit coffee shops you like and attend classes and workshops where you can meet someone like-minded.
What’s most important is to think about what you do want — not what you don’t — and go into each date with an open mind and a willingness to listen. You never know who will surprise you if you really give them a chance. Focus on what they have to say.
Also, you really have to love yourself first before you can fully love another and let yourself be loved. So take time over the next week or two to love yourself even more — we suggest complimenting yourself when you look in the mirror, writing down three things you’re proud of yourself for doing (or not doing) at the end of each day and letting go of any negative self-talk as soon as it starts buzzing in your brain.
Being single has a lot of perks. Enjoy this time, because you never know what the stars have in store and how fast your relationship status can change forever when you meet the right person.
B. If you’re in a relationship …
Whether you’ve been dating a few months or married for 10 years, life gets busy and time flies by. It’s easy to take your partner or relationship for granted, so it’s important to mentally return to the beginning of your relationship and relive how excited and grateful you were to be connected with your partner.
Take a moment today to write down three things about your partner and your relationship that you’re grateful for. Make this a monthly ritual to help keep the love alive and prevent taking them for granted.
Also, make it a point to take moments out of your day or week to remind your partner how much you care — it can be something as simple as a text during the work day or leaving a thoughtful, loving note on a paper napkin.
Relationships need attention to survive, let alone thrive, so carve out time to plan trips, enjoy date nights and do things to break up the routine so you can enjoy the rush of trying new things together.
Don’t forget to invest in your own life, too. It’s never a good idea to place your happiness in your partner’s hands, and you have to have a life you love on your own. Spend time with friends and doing things that light you up.
Having your own life will also help avoid the mundane, “How was your day?” “Good, and yours?” conversations that fall on every couple from time to time. Instead, your talks will be filled with good stories and interesting ideas — what couple doesn’t want that?
C. If you’re not sure where the heck you stand …
Call it limbo, call it a situation, you’ve been dating-ish, but you’re not clear what’s your status or if it’s even going anywhere. OR, maybe you’re in a relationship, but don’t know what’s next — is this heading down the aisle? Do you want to be married? Is it even on the table? So many questions …
It’s hard to focus on love when there’s a lot of uncertainty in the air. So now’s a good time to get some clarity, especially if it’s keeping you up at night. It’s not easy, but muster the courage to ask the questions that are weighing on your mind. It’s important to speak your truth, Savvy.
Get the answers and clarity you need so you feel comfortable where you stand — or know whether you need to leave (as hard as that may be). Sometimes we have to say goodbye to something good to clear the space for something even better to come into our lives.
No matter the outcome, it’s important that you love and respect yourself enough to ask questions, honor what you want and at the same time honor what the other person wants too. Whatever route you choose, you’ll be able to do so with much more confidence.
Just be sure to practice self-love, too — it’s crucial during this time. Because the more we love ourselves, the more we can give and receive love. So remind yourself often: What you have to say is important. You are amazing. You deserve love.
Make 2019 the year where love wins, and you could discover this is your favorite year yet.
Happy loving, Savvies!
Quote du jour
“You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back.” — Barbara De Angelis
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