We all want to be heard, but we don’t always make a point to listen. In fact, did you know the average person only remembers between 25% to 50% of what they hear? (Seriously!) But when it comes to building better relationships and truly connecting with people we love it’ll behoove us to do better.
It sounds easy, but with so many distractions (looking at you, smartphones!) listening can be hard. Do you ever find yourself so focused on what you want to say and just waiting for the right moment to interject that you miss what the person speaking to you is really saying?
Or, how about when you’re actually into what someone’s talking about, but you hear that little ding sound from your phone and suddenly lose focus?
None of us want to be bad listeners, and we want to give the people around us respect, so today we’re sharing four easy ways to become a better listener. They’re simple things, but they can have a big impact in how you communicate with others. We all feel happier when we feel like people truly “get” us, and by listening better you’ll better understand those around you (and they may even follow your lead and become a better listener to you too!).
Here’s how to get started:
- Put away your phone. Turn it on silent or put it in another room so you won’t be distracted by any notifications, calls or texts.
2. Repeat back what you hear. You can repeat things back in your head while someone is talking, and/or paraphrase what you heard out loud when they’re done. Doing so helps you stay focused, and makes sure you understand what was said.
3. Don’t worry about your response. Sometimes we start thinking about how we’ll answer the person talking, or what anecdote we’ll share when we’re done — but if you’re thinking about your response, then you’re not really listening to what they’re saying. Wait until they’re done, then consider what you’ll say. (Yes, this might mean some pauses or moments of silence, but it’s worth it for a quality conversation!)
4. Use the person’s name while you’re speaking. Saying someone’s name can actually help you focus on them — plus people love hearing their names.
Will you give these tips a try during a conversation today? If you do, let us know if they help! We’re listening (OK, reading, but close enough). 😉
Wishing you a fantastic weekend!
XO,
Emily and the EveryDay Happy Team
Quote du jour
“One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say.” — Bryant H. McGill
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